As of today, my husband and I have officially been married for 6 months (woohoo!). While I definitely still consider myself a newlywed (at what point do you become oldlywed?), I already feel pretty settled into the military life. After a little refection, I realized that there are some things I used to do all the time as a military girlfriend and new wife, and I thought I’d share a few of them with you (along with some things that I haven’t done personally, but have seen other new wives do).
Just for the record, these are all fun and games and I realize that they don’t apply to EVERYONE, so before you get all butt-hurt about how you’re a new wife and you’d never do that, let’s take a step back and just laugh at ourselves, shall we?
1. Put on real pants and make-up to go to the commissary.
If a few errands are the only thing requiring me to step outside my house today, you can bet your bottom dollar you won’t find me wearing blush and mascara (although I definitely put on real clothes and make-up for the commissary during the early days of our marriage… That was before I realized that nobody cares).
2. Get nervous at the security gate on base.
“Oh, uh, hi… Good evening, I mean, uh, morning, gentlemen.” Did I just call them gentlemen?
3. Google acronyms, ranks, etc…. All the time.
Or, if you’re like me, you’ll just ask your husband… Again. Because you’ve probably already asked him what OPSEC means about four times by now.
4. Confuse the different branches.
To my knowledge, I never did this—but I’ve seen SO many military spouses pin things like a hair bow made with army ACU material to a board called “Proud Air Force Wife” on Pinterest. Come on, at least learn about your husband’s branch if you’re not going to take the time to learn about the others!
5. Forget to ask for military discounts.
I’ve gotten to the point where I pretty much know which places offer a military discount around here and which ones don’t, but for awhile there I found myself continuously facepalming for forgetting to ask—especially when it was for a big purchase, like $300 worth of work on our car.
6. Try to roll sleeves… And fail miserably.
My husband is a Marine and we got married during desert cammies season. Apparently the art of sleeve-rolling isn’t near as simple as it looks.
7. Refer to everyone in the military as “soldiers.” *cringe*
I hate when the media does this, but when spouses do this? Arrrrgggghhhh. WHY?! Please, just call them “service members” or refer to them as “the military” or something. Maybe CNN can get away with it, but military spouses sure can’t, in my humble opinion.
8. Go the wrong way down a one-way street on base.
Anybody? No? Okay, so maybe that was just me…
9. Get intimated at the gym on base.
But most of these people are in the military and they’re all big and scary and can lift 8 times my body weight and I can barely run a mile!
Eh, you get over it. Besides, those people are there to work out, NOT to look at you.
10. Wear their spouse’s dog tags outside of their shirt.
I love wearing my husband’s dog tags when we’re physically separated, but this one really bothers me (especially when the dog tags are outside of the shirt and they don’t even have silencers!!!!!). From what I’ve seen, it’s mostly military girlfriends, although I have seen a few wives guilty of this. Nobody wants to hear your s/o’s dog tags clinking around all day, and most people find it disrespectful when worn outside of clothing (just in case you weren’t aware). It’s totally okay to wear them but please, tuck them in!
What did I miss? Please share with us!